Taco Block

Block one in the building blocks of cooking has arrived!

It is the ever tasty Taco Block, blocking not only your intestines, but blocking out a full hour of time on the toilet. To start in on this journey, below is a picture of the ingredients you need.

taco_setupYou will notice a lot of Italian sausage and even more cheese. Sure, there are some peppers, onion, beans, and tomatoes in there, but let’s not steal the glory from our true stars. Any when I say a lot of meat, I mean a lot of meat. This is no pansy show, so put in as much as you…

meat_prepOH MY GOD TOO MUCH MEAT! To late, what’s done is done and your blocked out hour just became two. So now that you have all that meat in a giant pan along with a can of black beans, a can of tomatoes(diced), and some cheese, stir away. As far as spices go, you definitely want to add in at least two packets of taco seasoning. This, along with the massive amounts of chili powder, onion powder, and black pepper is going to give you irresistible meat that’s hard to beat.

Please stop here to consider why I have specified given amounts of certain things and not of others. I assure you I do this for the sole reason of getting you to put in too much sausage and cheese. That’s what we in the food industry refer to as the good shit. Also, if you didn’t use Italian sausage, I won’t judge you, but just rest assured you messed up and your food belongs in the garbage.

Now it’s time for the portion that justifies this as healthy. Put that whole onion, and both of those bell peppers in a pan for their share of cooking. There’s no need to over soften these though.

vegetables prepNow that everything is cooking it’s time to read your pan o’ grease. First thing you need is a big glass pan with large sides. You don’t believe me? I see you reaching for that small pan, well, no, you know what, fine. I warned you though. Put two tortillas on the bottom of the pan and four more should be half sticking out of the pan. This means on each side is a tortilla half sitting on the bottom tortillas and half flapping in the wind. These are the side flaps for future entombment of the monst… food. Now give the base a sprinkling of cheese.

ready_the _panThat’s more than a sprinkling? Again, note the generic amount. To some NFL players that’s a pinch of cheese.

Great, your other food is probably just about done cooking. Add in a can of refried beans to your meat mixture and mix in the vegetables while you’re at it. Then go ahead and let this mixture heat up a bit.

Add the beansFrom here on in it’s in the pan. Go ahead and pour a third of this mixture into the tortilla bed. Caress the mix until it has spread across the pan and pat it lightly to ensure full relaxation (Yes this thing is alive. You couldn’t tell?).

first layer

The next step is simple. Just put down two more tortillas in the bed and add on a second layer with the second third of your mixture. Aww heck, throw a third in there too.

FullSizeRender(1)That’s not enough cheese though.

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Seriously? More cheese!

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I’ll say when.

much_moreYeaaaahhhhhhh. When.

Alright, now comes the previously mentioned entombing. Fold those tortillas on top over the top and plop another can of refried beans on top. This is going to add some weight to the flaps and allow us to glue them together.

FullSizeRender(2)Utilize your new glue layer by throwing another tortilla right on top. And surely you know what goes on top? Yes, more cheese. Now assuming you can still lift it, into the oven it goes. Let the cheese melt and the make those tortillas a little crispy. This step shouldn’t take more than 10 minutes before you’re left with a beauty. Cut in and see for yourself.

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That piece of cheese stringing towards the camera was stuck to my chin. With that in mind, enjoy your delicious taco block.

Happy intestinal pain!

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